IN BETWEEN

I’ve recently had a new found love for the game basketball. I’ve been playing daily and getting increasingly better. Some other gym rats and I often get together and play an old school classic called knock out. I am consistently one of the first ones out, I get up to the hoop and people start shooting behind me and I panic… I just start firing the ball at the backboard frantically trying to make the shot before I’m out. Someone that I play with quite often tells me that I need to relax…

I was thinking about this concept and in general how I panic so quickly. I step up to the free throw line of life and I start thinking about my future.. and how old I am… and how I have no clue what I am doing.. how I haven’t finished school.. and im not married… and how I should be speaking in stadiums and saving the whole world by now.. and uh.. AHH!! PANIC!!! So I just start firing at the backboard missing everyshot, focused on everyone watching and how im failing constantly. I spent so much time in anguish and feeling like I had no solution to my worry.

A few days ago I was working out on the Step Mill and I decided to set it one level higher than normal. I huffed and puffed and sweat for 30 minutes.. I almost didn’t make it I swear, and at the end of it I looked at my calories burned and it was only 5 calories more than before… FIIIIIIVVVEEE!!!! I felt so discouraged.

Moments after I was watching the KU vs KS game on the arch trainer where Kansas was being crushed by K-state. I wanted to cry. I kept getting frustrated because they were wasting all their shots on 2-pointers when I wanted them to go for 3. At the time we were down by 11, I kept yelling “come on score some big ones”!! A friend of mine looked at me and said “Mindy, there’s no such thing as an 11 point shot” Then it hit me…

Life happens slowly. In order to get to a level on the Step Mill where I saw results happening I had to go through levels where I didnt, Because although level 10 may not burn as much, 11 and 12 will. But this ultimately has nothing to do with calories. It has to do with the fact that life happens one step at a time, and sometimes certain steps or seasons are gonna make no sense whatsoever. Were not going to understand some things but we have to trust that its part of His plan for our lives. I want to end up in these big places but I’m skipping all the little steps in between. I believe that God is going to use me in BIG ways in SMALL places. I know that He has so much purpose for me in the HERE and NOW but ive got to take my eyes off the future and place them on the present. Seasons are flying by and hopefully someday I’ll see dreams happen… but for now and maybe forever… I am ready for the IN BETWEEN.

- mdp

“Breathe in me Your life I can feel You are close now, I can never hide
 You are here and You know me. All I need is You And I love You. Breathe in me Your life ‘Til Your love overtakes me, Open up my eyes Let me see You more clearly. Falling on my knees ‘Til I love like You love me."